Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

Boy: Dad, come here I need to tell you something. Dad: What? Boy: My name is Jeff. Dad: *Grabs shotgun* " I've had with that damn term"

Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

What do a black person and a monkey have in common? A. They both are organism that need food and water to survive.

What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

A mute says to a paraplegic: You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar. That was just the first person.

yo momma is so stupid she went to the beach and the whales song " dooooooonnn't stop. belieeeeving. wwwwwhoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOA"

why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human language promptly shits on the floor then leaves.

A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

A Black Man walks into a bar...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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