What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

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you just lost the game

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In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

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What's green, and looks like money? Money...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I am blind.

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Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

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Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

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Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing set? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

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why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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How many Manatees does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, assuming Manatees have hands.

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Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

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roses are red violets are blue i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

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Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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