A Squirrel gets ready for hybernation. 21 You Stupid

thumb_up thumb_down

i hate non minorities!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Nippies

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech? One is a blood-sucking parasite, and the other practices law for a living.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely white man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

thumb_up thumb_down +12

nock nock who's there? bob bob who? bob franklin let me in 'cause i'm freezing!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How do you get 1000 babies into a bucket? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? The woman wasnt premature and abused from an early age.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops