Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

you give like i give lomain

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why do girls have bumps around their nipples ? -it's brai for suck here .

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Chuck Norris is a normal man.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Man goes fishing.... Catches Fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How does a blonde restart her computer? Seriously, you guys, I need help. I'm not a very technological person.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call 6 white men on a bench? The NBA

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Wendy went for a walk every day in the forest. Why not today? She was shot yesterday

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops