Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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What is white and can't walk? A PVC Pipe.

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Dead babies and disabled kids. Jews, mexicans and black people. Hitler and prostitutes. Sex sex sex sex sex.

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What is red and tastes like parsley? Red Parsley

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What did the gun say to the pencil? Draw

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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Knock knock Who's there? Barack obama

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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My name is Matt and I am homosexual. Just kidding. My names Rick.

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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Knock Knock Whose there? A field full of mexicans A field full if mexicans who? F**k You

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I love it when i go into my classroom first thing in the morning, and the light are off... i always feel so Empowered... i walk in, and say Let There Be Light! while i lift my arms up and there was light.... omg! im god! O_O

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Sam alexander is also r8 g4y

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

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If an aeroplane falls from 15,000 feet in the air and crashes into and orphanage is it possible that no-one will get hurt? No,the aeroplane will destroy the orphange hurting the property value.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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why did the baby cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken -written by sion dafydd jones, uk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops