Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it!!!

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fi uoy nac daer siht sdrawkcab uoy tsuj daer siht sdrawkcab

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Three blind mice walk into a pub. They are all unaware of their surroundings, so to derive humor from it would be exploitative.

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Womens' sports

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

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Roses are red violits are blue I have ADHD do you like cats?

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Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

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Joe: it says gullible on the ceiling Jack: yes, I wrote it -by Ross

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

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Black people are clen.

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what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

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Did you hear about the guy that dropped the soap in prison? He apparently gripped it a bit too tightly causing it to slip out of his hands, but managed to pick it up promptly and finish showering with no further incidence.

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A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

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your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

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What's the difference between a kleenex and a man? One absorbs your tears while the other makes you cry.

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Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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