Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a smart blond? A golden retriever!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are having a baby. Even Stevie Wonder saw that one coming.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +12

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the womens basketball team beat the mens? the men were locked in a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +51

If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

hi im paul!

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

2 guys are on a scaffolding. One of them says to the other "If you fall from here, theres a high probability you will die"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the lamp say to the woman Nothing, a lamp is a plastic glass and metal inaminate object therfore it can not speak

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A mexican and a black person are in the back of a car. Whos driving? A bus driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: I have no Idea what you would call cheese which isn't yours. However, it seems quite trivial to take time to discuss a nonsensical topic such as cheese which isn't yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops