- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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How do you know if a black man was in your house while you weren't home? When you let them enter to babysit your children.

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What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

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Why did the woman cross the road? To welcome the new neighbors.

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Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

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Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

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There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

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A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

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Knock Knock. Who's there. To. To who. To whom.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Can you smell what the Rock is cooking? Yes, it's delicious!

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God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

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Roses r red violets r blu I hav5 fingers the middle ones for u

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

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Your mother is so ugly corrective surgery would not be able to improve her appearance

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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