Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

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Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

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whats the difference of the mexican and the bench the mexicans alive

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What hurts people but doesn't? Child Birth. -Dave Papile

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What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Whats the difference between a jewish man wearing a fedora and glass of almond milk? Ones a glass of almond milk.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person who lives inside is depth.

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why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

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What do you get if you take the head off a Koala and a Wombat and swap them around? A bloody mess and about 4 years in jail.

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What did Santa Clause say to Rudolf? Nothing. Santa's not real.

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Why did the chines were sunglasses? It was sunny.

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Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

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How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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