Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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Name an American born white man in the NBA. Thats right, you cant

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Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John, your son. Now open the door.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

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If this joke were a potato I would be very confused

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why did they make a new iphone? because individuals like to be connected to local and world wide media so they can stay in touch with all news, friends and family.

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Yo momma so fat she went on the Subway diet and is now exercising regularly to lose weight.

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

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what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

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Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

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Jellybeans

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Two men walk into a bar...They are traveling together for a convention and like pub type bars and are excited to be there.

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a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

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Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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gays

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An American, Mexican, and Chinese men are each asked to throw something off a cliff that they have too much of. The Chinese threw off rice. The Mexican threw off tacos. And the Americans.. Well.. They threw off the Mexicans.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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