A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

What do you call a black midget with no legs and has 11 fingers? A human being

my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

A horse walks into a bar the barmam asks why the long face The horse replies he's suffering from depression after his family was killed in a car crash and he has now turned to alcohol to sort his sorrows

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

every 60 seconds in africa a minute passes

How do you know if you have a good slave? It is hard working and determined... And black

Did you hear about the man with 3 balls? He liked tennis

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

I like Pi. It can make circles.

Knock knock Who's there? Yolanda I do not know anyone by that name. I am sorry Oh I must be at the wrong house. My apologies. Oh, it's alright. Have a nice day You too. Take care!

Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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