What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

How does a black guy die? Unknown

what is big round and fat? Your MOM

The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

Why doesn't the mexican have a job? Grad school is taking up too much of his time.

Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I peek in your window, Yes, I'm watching you

It’s dead.

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

im the real danny hamilton you stupid asshole

How many dead babies does it take to fill up a car? Dead babies should be reported to the police and not be stuffed into cars.

Please don't tell anybody about me, or I will be hunted down, taken from my family, and be objected to a life of cruel exploitation.

What's the difference between John Candy and Chris Farley? Nothing. They're both dead.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is an active member of a taliban.

What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...