police are looking for max 'cheesehead' harrison

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

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whats worse than gill? nothing

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Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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Q: what did one kangaroo say too the other kangaroo? A: I was told I am schizophrenic.

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How do you drown a blond? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

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Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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Why don't you throw a rock at a Mexican on a bike? Because depending on the size of the rock, you could seriously injure him.

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Bloody kids ...

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Where was the declaration of independes? At the bottom

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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