So this Horse walked into a bar... Just kidding, it was Sarah Jessica Parker.

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On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

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Q: What would happen if you threw a red brick into the black sea? A: It would get wet.

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Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

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What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

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I'm an old man with Alzheimer's. Ok I'm going to tell you a little story. Well i was walking down the road bout 36 sum odd years ago and the next thing i knew i was........... Hmmm.... i wonder whats in the fridge...

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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Why did Billy go into the white van? Because his parents came to pick him up from school.

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If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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if your having trouble coming through the back door, try a Butterfinger

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whats funny ? not you i am telling the joke around here

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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A man jumped off a cliff. He died.

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

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Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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