Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

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Sam Hengal.

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

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Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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Why don't bats have penises? They do. I tried. Menstruation.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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Why so serious? Your brother died.

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A hispanic man eats a taco and enjoys. He is kicked in the nuts 2 months later.

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A niggarette

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Yo mama so dirty she takes a shower every night

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

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Bumsniffer

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Why the USA support the 'Kony 2012'? For Oil

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Two muffins were in an oven. One of them said, "It's sure hot in here!" The other muffin didn't respond because it's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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