Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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Knock knock It's open

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Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

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dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to foodstuffs.

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A dog walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out as animals are not allowed.

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Why did the girl cross the road ? Because i was following her.

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"And i look to myself what the hell happened to our world..."

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

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an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Jojobas Witness open up

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Three head lice are drinking beer on a scalp, then they are killed by a high strength medical shampoo.

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In Soviet Russia, joke tells YOU! ...because that is the syntax of the language.

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke in anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

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YOLO MAH BROLO

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Want to hear a dirty joke? The horse fell in the mud

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the battle of waterloo

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What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

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Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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