Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

How do you starve a Somalian? Too late.

whats red bubbly and looks out of a windo? a baby in a mocrowave

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

whats brown and smells like shit shit

what does a human and a bucket of red paint have in common? . . Both are not tigers

What's worse than your dad dying in a car crash? Your mom being in the same car.

Q: What is worse than a dead baby in a trashcan? A: A dead baby in 10 trashcans.

What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

A depressed gay teenager goes to his boyfriend’s house. Why and what happens? Shaun was often discriminated against for being homosexual. He always tried to be positive and a good person, but when his parents disowned him, Shaun couldn’t help but feel alone and unloved. Upset, Shaun went to his boyfriend’s house to seek comfort from his lover. Sunny, his boyfriend, immediately told Shaun that he loved him and things will get better for both of them. A year later, Shaun rebuilds his relationship with his old family and they apologize for their lack of understanding. Sunny and Shaun are very close emotionally, and wish to get married. However, they live in Texas, where marriage is outlawed. Shaun’s family agrees to help aid the couple financially in their marriage. They help Sunny and Shaun move to New York City where they had a successful gay marriage and pursued their dreams of becoming a video-game character designer/artist and a professional hop-hop dancer, respectively. They adopt their first child two months later and raise their child positively, and adopt her younger sister five months after that. The two daughters love their two dads and grow up to be a successful NASA scientist and a talented singer, respectively. Sunny and Shaun live a long, happy life together filled with love, happy, and joy. They die peacefully in their nineties.

What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

"Hey have you seen Stevie wonders car. Neither has he.

what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

compardre No Pew.. Pew.. At mi OINK.. OINKs...

A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asks the bartender. "I'm a horse, it's genetic." replied the horse, confused at the bartender's infantile understanding of evolution and other species.

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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