How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

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Some guy: Which of these is not delicious,watermelon,chicken,or kool aid. Black guy: What?

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lyren is a big meanyhead

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What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

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What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

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What happens when you feed a Mini-horse a Happy Meal? If it doesn't die choking on the plastic toy included in the meal, It will most likely develop a terminal case of horse diabetes and suffer through a slow painful dying process.

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A middle-aged white woman is walking toward a building, talking on her cellphone to a friend. She says, "Yes, I can meet you for lunch in a few hours. I have to go to the unemployment office to sign up for benefits. It's going to be horrible. It'll probably be full of black people." Standing in line, she is incredibly uncomfortable and horrified, because there is a black man right behind her, and she is stuck standing next to him for a long time. Finally it's her turn, and she steps up to the counter. The clerk asks her, "And what did you do for a living?" She answers, "I mopped the floors and cleaned the bathroom in a Blockbuster store that closed down." The clerk says, "Fill out this paperwork and take it to window #2." As she turns around, she is once more repulsed by the black man who is standing right there. Now that it's his turn, he steps to the counter, and the clerk asks him, "And what did you do for a living?" He answers, "I was the senior vice president of global strategic development for Eastman Kodak."

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What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

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When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

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Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

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* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

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A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

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How are cherries and kittens different? They're both fun to cut up.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 witnessed while hiding in a closit 7 rape and kill his mother.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

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What do you call an African american in your back yard A slave (I am sorry this is racist)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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