Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come out with your hands up.

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A man walks into a bar, and he says, "ow,".

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how do you poke a chinese person in the eye? with a credit card!

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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Six hats walk out of a garden. When mustard offal fruit paps.

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TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL! Cant we just dine at McDonalds? ITS THE SAME THING! Moral: Personally I love the taste of cardboard meat...

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Not the Twin Towers.

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Whats worse than peeing blood? Dying.

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Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Knock knock Nobody's home.

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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I walked into an elevator with Ray Rice...

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Why did the man die from drinking the water? It wasn't water, it was acid.

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What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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