Q: why did sally fall off the swing A: she had no arms A:knock knock Q:who is there A:not sally

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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Why do they call you the interrup... SHUT UP!

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What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

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Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

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Q: why is halloween scary? A: because your there!!!

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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True fact: every rabbit lives their whole cute life.

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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A black guy goes to the bar. The Barman say: What would you like to drink?

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What is it called when a Native American Indian man smacks a woman in the face for cheating on him? In police code it's called a "273D Domestic violence - Felony" most likely involving an insecure man with control problems simply adding to the stereotype that Native American's are drunk, abusive and domestically violent people.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

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What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

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What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

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Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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