GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A Wii.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobile? -Come on Robin, get into the Batmobile!

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

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Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

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What's a black mans favorite thing to do Depends on that particular mans likes and interests

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

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What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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There are four types of people in this world. I never said I would name them all

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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Cripples are lame.

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

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Whats the different betweene a drugdealer and a cop? I dont know but i think they dont have the same wife.

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Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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