How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

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Q: What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A: A pilot, you racist.

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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Person 1: What did the narwhal say to the other narwhal. Person 2: I don't know... What? Person 1: How am I supposed to know? Shortly after a serious argument breaks out.

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Me: Ask me if i'm a truck. You: Are you a truck? Me: No.

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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I have a friend named Jay . But for short , he likes to be called J .

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What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Doesn't matter get in the van.

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What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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what's white and sticky semen

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Whats sadder than a lost baby deer? Im too lazy too think of the rest of the joke.

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Osama bin Mohammed bin Awad bin Laden was born in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, a son of Mohammed bin Awad bin Laden, a billionaire construction magnate with close ties to the Saudi royal family.

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A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

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Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Send her to her room until she becomes civil enough to explain what was causing her misbehavior.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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