Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

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If a blonde and a brunette are both falling out of a building, which one will hit the ground first? The brunette, she jumped first.

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A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

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what is black and green and red all over q: Nothing, you cant have 3 colors on the same surface

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

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Not a joke.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

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Why you so fat... Because you have an eating problem fatass...

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Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

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why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

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Anti-Jokes are the bomb .org

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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What do you throw a drowning guitarist? An emergency floatation device.

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What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

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Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

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knock knock who's there Steve Go away

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

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How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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