Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

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How do you make a Trucker cry? Kill his family and chop of his arms.

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What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

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Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Starting a Genocide #YOLO

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Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

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A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

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What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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what hurts more than a stab wound? two stab wounds

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Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a stupid chicken wandering around.

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Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

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An old man walks into a grocery store, but doesn't come out. What happened? A plane crashed into the grocery store, killing everyone inside.

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Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

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Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

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What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

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tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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