Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

They say "You are what you eat." In that case, I'm a pussy.

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

Paperclip... BANANA?!

A black man, a mexican man and a chinese man all walk into a supermarket. Together, they purchase ingredients to make a delicious vegetarian lasagna. That night, they make the lasagna and greatly enjoy it together.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

Photons have mass? i didn't even know they were catholic.

Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was stapled to the head of a penis that belonged to an asian man

Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There's now a sandwich named after Jerry Sandusky, it's got 60 year old meat stuffed between buns barely out of the oven.

Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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