What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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This ones for the dudes: Whats worse then having sex with a woman with no penis? Having se with a man

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Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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Why was the man arrested? He had brutally stabbed 398 people in a 10 hour period.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

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"Doctor, doctor, I am having a hard time controlling my muscles!" "It's Lesche-Nyhan Syndrome, this is a genetic terminal illness...i'm sorry."

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A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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I can't stand 9/11 jokes Their just plane wrong!

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Once a upon of time, cow said chicken go cluck. Years later, mustard was like a ketchup. I said it was good. Oh yea baby. It was a good day.

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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so 3 guys walk into a bar.....the 4th one ducks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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