What did Grandma give little Ben for Christmas? Nothing.She died on Thanksgiving day.

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What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's a trick question: feminists can't change anything.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away."

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Yo mama is so fat that: it is ruining her self esteem and she worries about her health.

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Why didn't the black man understand an anti-joke? Because like any other member of the human race, he expected a typical joke structure to occur, starting with a misleading introduction which then using surrealism or misguidance trails into a humorous punchline.

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Meanwhile, at La'kaneisha's family reunion, they had a great time eating caviar, steamed lobster, and rare bull testicals.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Heheheheh, Good one, you made me laugh, you just made me realize that it was indeed I that said that to you once, and now you are telling me. I know now, I am happy, not because I seek happiness, but because thinking, finding solutions, guiding myself and others, is what makes me happy. I feel like an alien, because my ideals, my solutions hopes and dreams that grow out of a result of my constant thinking, will never be in this world. Yet I also feel human now, because it could have been, humanity could have succeeded...

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Q: What do you call a successful black person? A: A fictional character.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

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What do you tell a woman with two black guys? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partners and seek help.

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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Yo mama is so stupid, she believes in god. God isn't real.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

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There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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