how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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What does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? Ow

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

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The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

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A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

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Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

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What smells bad and is black, A very dirty dead decomposing body.

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Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

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The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

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Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

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Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

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What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

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An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

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What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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