Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

Mr. Wonder, optimism is seeing the glass as half full, pessimism as seeing the glass half empty, and realism as not seeing the glass at all.

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

what happens when you mix a black guy and a Mexican? nothing, it is physically impossible to "mix" people.

What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting cancer from a horse.

What's funnier than 24? 25

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

123 Main street

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

How is a fat girl like a tiny motorcycle? She isn't, and you should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking how she might be.

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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