A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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.........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................00............................................................................................................................................I..........................................................................................................................................._____....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

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Q. why did the plane crash? A. because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

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What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

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I feel like making a good joke.But i cant. YN

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

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Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

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How long does it take a woman to park a car? Shouldn't take long, depends on the size of the parking spot.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

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I Used to be an Adventurer like you, Then I retired to achieve the top Anti-Joke.

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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Two hunters walk in to the forest. They have a great time ending the lives of defenceless creatures. They go to their respective homes, eat a light dinner, and fall asleep in their beds.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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A preschool teacher told his class to draw a squirrel. One child proceeds to break into tears. The teacher says "what's wrong Johnny?" Johnny said "my whole family was slaughtered by a gang of squirrels!" this upset the teacher

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Don't turn around when you're talking to me. Why? You will walk off of that cliff

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What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

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why didn't the bully beat up the nerds? His mom got arrested for molestation and his dad got sent to Afganistan so he was too depressed to beat them up.

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"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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