Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it was tree

thumb_up thumb_down +5

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did brad pay the sexy looking librarian with a big smile on his face? Becouse brad returned his books to late and had to pay a fine for that. The librarian made a joke about the fact that it was a waste of money to return the books late.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mom was diagnosed with aids. Her prognosis was 6 months....clearly this joke is about the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's pink and fluffy? A feather duster.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

i fell like im going to reverse john becase i ate a bikle penis jackson

thumb_up thumb_down

A black guy and Hispanic guy jump off the Empire State Building at the EXACT same time. Who dies first? Who cares?!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many illegal immigrants does it take to change a lightbulb? Why should his legal status matter at all in this situation?

thumb_up thumb_down +301

What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

thumb_up thumb_down +12

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the black man fail math? He had missed many classes due to his mother's terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happens when you shoot chuck norris? he dies

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops