Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jon "Bones" Jones will be fighting Rashad Evans for the Light Heavyweight title tonight at 10PM Eastern time at UFC145.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family

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how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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What's the most famous anti-joke? This one.

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Because I'm colorblind

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

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What is black, white, and red all over? A zebra that was shot by poachers.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting anal raped twice

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This little pig went to market, This little pig stayed at home, This little pig had pork chops, And this little pig was GONE...

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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