How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

UP

Why did the young teenager cut class? To cut himself! Get it?! Its a pun!

what makes margaritas good. illegal immagrants in the basement.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

What in the world is that thing in her butt!!!

What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

The banana, the raspberry and the pear arrived to the party, then the carrot and the tomato arrived as well, but when the apple and the orange arrived the banana left... ...This where just getting to fruity...

How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

What's brown and sticky? My ass.

why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

knock knock. Who's There? Cancer.

what did the comedian tell the audience? a joke.

Whats sorer than stubbing your toe? Stubbing your toe twice

How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

Why did the black girl and white guy have sex? Because they were both sexually attracted to each other.

Why wasn't the man wearing a life vest? Because he was sleeping.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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