Why can't black people swim? Because most African American individuals grow up in inner urban cities where they have little or no access to swimming facilities.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Jason. Jason wh-(death sound when being cut by chainsaw)

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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Why do Jews circumcise their children.......because they like everything 10% off

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How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

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GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

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Why did Sally not get her permission slip signed? Because her parents where murdered. Why did Sally not think to ask her grandparents? Because there in jail for killing her parents.

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Potato.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

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Why Sam Vitale gay? Because he loves men!

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What is the difference between a black man and a Chevrolet? They didn't sell Chevrolets in the 1800s.

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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What do a book and a tractor have in common? Both are for driving, except the book.

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We have come to the United States in search of a just, and profitable land, but we have found a place of bigots and racists.

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Joker2? Who comes up with the names anyways? Sounds like a stupid version of the matrix... Anyways, I stutter because my nerves are killing me, I cant quit the painkillers cold turkey if I cant sleep without them, besides I am used to physical pain as tragic as that might sound... Its not when you get used to it. I need to know who this Neo-Nero was, for anyone that can tell me, he is not around here at these hours, and during the time he/she I was dead, did considerable damage to my and my orders reputation, I need a face to face talk to someone that would put aside my chosen successor and assume my role, and I wont let that happen again even if it means bruising up this Neo-me a bit.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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the waterhorse is a beautiful creature. It often frolics through fields of wheat.

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What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

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What do you call a blond in a library? A girl that likes to read.

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What do you call a black guy that drives a plane? A pilot

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops