Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz he does what he wants.

knock, knock. use the doorbell next time.

the bible

Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

Thumbs this up

What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

what do you call a slave with a dream of being free? whatever his name happens to be

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

what did the dead woman say the boy? I am dead.

I like my girls like my wisky. Strong, tastes and the leading cause of liver damage.

If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

Q: why did suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock. Q: who's there? A: not suzy!

What do you call a man that likes fishsticks? His name

knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

What's the most racist thing ever... Manhattan

Why did the man cry when he went to the doctor? He has a terminal illness progressed to the point of cure and would die in 3 hours.

What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?' The horse says "I was just diagnosed with testicular cancer."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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