Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

Why was danielle so fat? She can't help her bad genetics

What did the black kid call the white kid? His name...

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple finding half a worm in your apple.

how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

Q: What did the German say to the Jew? A: Guten Tag.

Two Jews walk in a bar...

whats purple and attacks like a bear? a purple bear

Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

Fat people

Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

What did the chickens say to the other chicken Go away mother clucker

Patient: I thonk I'm gonna die Doctor: well will ya hurry up and die already? I've got to treat a kid with a paper cut.

What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A nugget

Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blow job I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

shabalabadingdong JLR

say yes will u remember me in a year?yes will u remember me in a month? yes will u remember me in a week?yes will u remember me in a minute?yes will u remember me in a second?yes knock knock whos there u said u will remember me u dick

What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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