I can't wait to eat this bagel! Yes you can. Yeah, I guess you're right.

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An old woman and her grandson arrive at the hospital, only to discover the floor drenched in triceratops shit.

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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A list of comebacks: Hows ur face nancy grace ur mom ur face ur moms face take it to my butt, cuz ur the only one that gives a crap

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What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

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Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

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A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

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What bird can lift the most? i do not know, I suggest asking an Ornithologist

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower. A Mexican that is fresh out of college and does not yet own a lawnmower.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

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Why was the 18 year old white male late for his college class. On his way to college he got in a car accident and killed 5 people and he walked away unharmed

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What's the difference between a soldier and a black man? A black man lives a normal life, probably working a full time job to bring income to his family. A soldier has seen his friends killed right before his very eyes, has probably killed, and most likely has night terrors accompanied by the sounds of gunshots and grenades. He will suffer trauma up until he dies of a heart attack in his mid 80's after experiencing a terrifying flashback of life in the war.

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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You say tomayto, I say ecstasy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops