What's worse than an apple with a worm? Serial Murder.

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69

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

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A man entered into a house, because it hadn't any door.

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whats a long boring sotry that no oneever wantsto read? the life of sarah palin.

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how do you have sex? i dont know im under age!

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b

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one and it is politically incorrect to assume otherwise.

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learn the ropes?

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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A lion, a leopard, a sheep, and a flesh eating New Zealand parrot stalk, trot and fly, respectively, into a bar. The parrot lands on the the sheep's back and begins to tear into its flesh in order to reach the succulent deposits of fatty tissue located around the sheep's kidneys. "Ouch!" Said the sheep. "Why would you do that? Oh, the pain! The pain!" "Squak!", Replied the NZ parrot, wiping blood of its sharp, hooked beak on the counter. "I think," Began the lion, "This parrot from New Zealand is hungry for fat from a sheep's soft, woolly back." The sheep's wool was now damp with blood. "Perhaps this parrot from New Zealand wants sheep fat from its soft woolly back." "Ah!" Said the sheep. "This parrot from New Zealand wants sheep fat from my soft woolly back!" "Yes", Replied the lion. "You could also say..." Started the sheep, "That an NZ parro-" The sheep did not finish his sentence. He died from his wounds. The lion left. The parrot flew off to tear up some windshield wipers. And the leopard stashed the sheep carcass in a tree branch for later consumption.

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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How do you call a half deaf duck? HEY DUCK!!!!!!

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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do you want to hear a joke 123456789 987654321 boo!

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Q:Why did the black man fall down? A: he got hit in the face by a refrigerator

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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Whats worse than missing the bus? Having the short bus picking u up

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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How Long Is A Chinaman's Name

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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