What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

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Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

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One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

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Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

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I would, but I see an older version of the kid, that suffered so much pain and agony.

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Women's rights

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A cow walks into a store. The clerk asks "how may i help you sir?" The cow says "Im a cow stupid!" and storms out.

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taking out the trash... at night

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A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

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So this guy comes into a bar... Jizz eveywhere.

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What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

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What is blue and looks like a bucket? A blue bucket

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Yo mamas so fat, when she jumps in a pool she displaces a disproportionate volume of water.

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

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Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

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Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

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what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

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What's worse than chicken pox? AIDs.

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A black man walks into a bar He looks at the menu and realizes he's in a bar, so he leaves

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What did the pineapple say to the apple? Nothing, neither can speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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