How do you know when a Frenchman has been near your house? You don't, really, unless you were there to see him or if one of your neighbours saw him. I wouldn't worry about it, really.

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what do you get if you take the head off a duck and a monkey, and swap them over to the other bodies. 2 dead animals and quite alot of mess

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Why doesn't the black man have a job? He's working on his masters degree.

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A. Did you hear about the circus fires? b. They were intense. (in tents)

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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knock knock whos there open the door and find out

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A seal walks into a club.

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What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

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Q: What do you call a successful black person? A: A fictional character.

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Q: What's the difference between a mountain goat and a pitching wedge? A: A lot.

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A guy walks into a bar. He then comes home at 4 a.m. to beat his wife.

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly.

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Why do girls like Justin beiber Because he can sing good

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what's red and smells like blue paint? im color blind

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why did the baby die? It was born with cancer

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whats 2+2? 1

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

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A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

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What do you get six year old Hitler for his birthday? An Easy Bake Oven

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What's the difference between a bike and a black man? I don't know how to ride a bike.

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If I had a nickel for every time I heard that... I'd most likely have no money as I would spend it all on cocaine.

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You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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