Whats fat yellow and diabetic Brett lai lan

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Some guy stapled it to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at it. Why did the girl fall off her bike? She was hit by 3 dead monkeys and a refrigerator.

Why did the straight man turn gay? He didn't. He was always gay but had to hide this from his family and friends because of an overwhelming sense of homophobia in his community.

how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Fear in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He said to himself, there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's Magical Basement. Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

What sounds really bad? An accordion.

A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

Here is the worst joke ever. ..... Dislike this and you are awesome!! P.S. I'm serious. I want to make a joke with the MOST DISLIKES ever! Don't think this is reverse psychology. I don't do that shi*t.

Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

What is the square-root of pi? ?pi

what do you call a attractive blond haired girl who sings songs. pixie lott

Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

An atheist and a Christian are sitting next to each other on the bus, however both of them believe it inappropriate to talk religion with complete strangers so neither one finds out about the others beliefs and they never see each other again.

Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

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What did the astronaut say at AA? Alcohol is ruining my life.

What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

What did the over confident jack-ass say to the hot girl, You'll do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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