A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

what do you call someone that works in a corner shop? Mohamed

Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

Ching Chong Bing Bong.. Yoyao? Dat U?

mitchell palmer sucks

Scenario: Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub The first one says, "Hey, can you pass the radio please" And the second one replies, "Sorry, my cousins are made of soap."

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

What did the cow say to the farmer who was driving by in a tractor? MOOOOOOOO!

What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

When life gives you lemons... you probably just found lemons...

What's sad about three black men driving over a cliff?

How do you make a clown cry? Kill his wife and kids.

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Why the long face?" The bartender backhands the man making him fall off of his stool.

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

Why was the black man fired from the bakery? He didn't work hard and was repeatedly absent

What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

Your Mom is so fat... I'm sorry I didn't mean that.. I have abandonment issues.

What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

Adele walks into the stables

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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