What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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What's the worst part about being drunk? Your child.

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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Why is Islam the fastest growing religion? Because black people breed like rats.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

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Why is Timmy a dumbass ? He's not, because asses cannot, by definition, be intelligent, so it is unnecessary to qualify it as "dumb".

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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why did the chicken go to the man? TO ask if he wants sex for money

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There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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What is a pirate's favorite kind of pizza? Cheese.

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Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

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I've got the moobs like jagger.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

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What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

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How do you get a one-armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops