What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

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Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

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u know whats a crime? rape

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Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

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What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? The bench can support a family.

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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rarw

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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p lkl

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knock knock. who's there thatsron thatsron who thatsron man

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So a Priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into the bar... And got drinks. What did you think was going to happen?

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Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

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Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

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Why did the black man die? He was shot

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Yo mamma so fat that she was chosen to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser and we are all so proud of the amount of weight she has lost.

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Women.

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What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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