how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

Why didn't the girl make it to the other side of the road? A police officer stoped her because she was j-walking.

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

Why did the aeroplane fall out of the sky? An ant jumped on it

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? depends on how thin you can slice them.

What did the doctor say to the Jew? You have cancer.

why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

Sure, I like all kinds of Juice. -Apple Jews -Grape Jews -Orange Jews The list goes on,,,

Roses are red Violets are blue You think you're smart But I've got a plan for you.. Leaves are green Stems are too You lied to me Now I will shoot you.. Violets are blue Roses are red You made me angry And now you are dead.

Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

I suck at online but have a high gamerscore

A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

What did the chemist say when his BBQ ran out of charcoal? Nothing interesting.

what do you call a cat with no tail? smithers.

Hey can you turn Tmartn upI can't hear him

What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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