So a man rapes a little girl but rips her eyes out before he does it. In court he said the appropriate thing about this was that she could not see it cuming.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a black man at school the janitor

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's bloody and has wheels? The Holocaust I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Velcro. What a rip off.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Set up Punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down

what do you call a fish with no eyes fsh

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops