Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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3 men- Greg-Allen-And James were on their way back from the bar. When the driver, Greg spun out of control. All of them died Instantly. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told them. " The better you were with Relationships, And loving just one person. The better Transportation you got." He bagan handing things out. " Well, Greg. Looks like you cheated on your most recent Girlfriend... Twice. You get a Bike." Next was Allen " Allen! Shame on you! You have dated 4 women at once! You get a Scooter!" And last was James. " James! You have stayed true to your wife! And all of your other ex- girlfriends. You get a Mustang!" Allen and Greg seen james, Sitting on his car, Upset. "Man! Whats wrong? You have the best thing you could get! I'd be happy!" James looks up and says " Thanks guys, But I just seen my Wife on A skateboard.."

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"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

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What's gay and gay? Joe

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Whats the difference between a raisin and a old lady? One is alive, i think.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? Nothing, he doesn't have the ability to open a present.

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A man named Jack has three kids. The oldest is named Jordan, the middle one is named Kim, and the youngest is named Alex. One day Jordan walked up to his father and asked him how his day was. His father replied, "It was fine."

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Why did the cat eat the cupcake? Cause he was hungry.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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I would write a joke, but it wouldn't be funny

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do you know what's so funny? yup

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Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

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A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

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What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

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how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They are both are fat and have beards, except for Tom Cruise.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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Why did the tight shirted Asian man spend all his time on his knees? Because when he was 12 he was forced to work in a textile factory where he lost his lower legs.

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Hello, I want likes. Press the up arrow.

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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