A man walks into a bar stark naked with a duck on his head. The bartender said "Dave, what's wrong?" The duck replies "Don't ask."

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? NOT SALLYYYY

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

I used to know what alzheimers was

What's the difference between a dead dog and a dead black man on the road? One's a dog and one is a man, but more importantly the differences shouldn't be noted in a miserable occasion such as this as both are unfortunate tragedies. Also, one has a big penis.

Click thumb up i will be eternally grateful

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

yes i can connor, this is brett.

what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

What's funnier than one anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

Jason's Wife said to him I love you before I left to head to work, Jason then went back inside to see no one was there and he remembered his wife died in 2009.

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. jack fell down and broke his crown, and is now in intensive care.

Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

Why didn't the boy blow out his birthday cake this year? He died last year.

What did one cow say to the other cow? nothing cows cant talk. They did however, exchange glances while chewing grass next to each other.

What's funnier then this joke? Women's rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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