why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

Wanna hear a joke? What? Life.

What did the person with down syndrome do? He mumbled for a while, chewed on his thumb, fell flat on his face, and died.

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

Two unemployed Irishmen are out looking for work when they pass a lumberyard. There's a sign outside that said "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean turns to Patrick and says " What a curious way to write that sign. Surely the term is lumberjack?" "Yes," says Patrick "but what with the current economic situation here in Ireland, I say we get in there, apply for the jobs and hope that our lack of experience is overlooked." "Okay." Says Sean. "And let's not mention the whole sign thing." "No."

Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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