What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

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Have you heard of the mute man that kept telling people he could not talk? Its funny because its true.

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That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

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A man and his friend are talking. The man says, "You know what's funny? Sometimes you mean to say one thing and you say a completely different thing. Like the other day I wanted to buy a ticket to pittsburgh, but the lady I was buying it from had very large breasts, so I accidentally said 'Can I have a picket to titsburgh?'" And the other guy says, "Yeah, man, it's really funny you say that, the other day I meant to ask my wife to pass the salt, and I said 'you whore, you ruined my life'"

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why couldn't the old man play basketball? he lacked the physical dexterity, had asthma, and had no arms.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

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What do you call five white guys sitting on a bench? THe NBA

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, becuse if something is red all over it cannot be black nor white.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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rarw

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what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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John Rustenburg at the dinner table

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a man was shot.... he died

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

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how many jews can you fit in a honda civic 1 in the driver seat, 1 in the passenger seat and 3 in the back properly fixed with safety belts.

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If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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