What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

knock, knock . whos there? the police. get the hell outside !

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's the difference between a Duck and Michael Jackson? A Duck has feathers and goes "Quack quack" and Michael Jackson touches little boys......

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats really hot the sun

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What does Patrick say? IM PATRICK!!! IM PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK PATRICK!!!!! PATRICK!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Patriarchy.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did Charlie Sheen say to Rebecca Black? If you care about the punchline I hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats brown and sticky? A peice of poo

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats white and pointless? chalk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops