How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

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How do you stop a fridge from making contact with the ground? Cut its cable's ground pin.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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Oh s***

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Sex education in Texas.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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What do you call two black guys holding up a store? Really strong.

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

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A Penguin Waddles into Abercrombie and Fitch.

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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knock knock who's there doctor doctor who No

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Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. One cow looks round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

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Why did the farmer name his pig "ink"? He had a terrible case of dementia.

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Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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