- Anti Joke

How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

Pigs have the emotional capacity of a five year old think about that next time you have to dissect one in biology

a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

what di the black kid get 4 x-MAS nothing

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

Q; What is green and eats rocks? A; The green rock eater... Q;What happens when you through a rock straight up in the north pole? A; The green rock eater eats it..

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

Your mom is so nice.

Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops