Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

What's 9+10 20+1-1-1+2-1-1+1-2+1

Q: What did the blonde woman say? A: My hair is blonde

Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

You know what's funny about table salt? Not much.

How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is slenderman and he is chasing 6

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

I'm a like whore

Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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