Roses are white, tulips are white, wait whos been masturbating in my garden!

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I hear Lebron has a new phone. He has it on silent all the time. It's because he doesn't want to disturb anyone around him while they prepare for important games in which he will be an indispensable part of, especially during the 4th quarters of the NBA Finals.

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What is yellow and Bear Grills has drunk on National Television. ...Lemonade.

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Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

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there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

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human centipede

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

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What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

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why is this joke funny because your laughing

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

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A man walked into this bar, and said ouch.

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

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An Ethiopian field worker goes into work one day and finds out he was fired. Agriculture in Ethiopia is bad because it doesn't rain much.

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What's worse than a bad test score? Getting hit buy a train!!

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A gay kid and a group of his friends are at the park. Gay: hey can you do a cartwheel? Girl: helllll no! Gay: Are you straight? Girl: Yah? Gay: Im gay and i can do one.

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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why did the guy with cancer die? because he had cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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