What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whos the best Jewish Cook? Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the difference between a dog and God? A dog is physical living creature while God is a supernatural being.

thumb_up thumb_down

A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

a hard working man goes home after a long day at work to find that his wife left him for his even harder working father.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a kid plays computer games alot and gets carpoltunel in both hands and lives in pain for the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a fat, ugly kid? An unloved child.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock-Knock Come in! ...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did chad do when he found the grape? He ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how many dumbasses does it take to make a kushagra

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops