you are gay

Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

HAHA HEHE... WOW that was a good one! i didn't get it...

Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the low cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

How do you call leprechaun with leprosy? Sick.

What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

Diana and victoria

Why Because

My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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