What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

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Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

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what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

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A woman walked into the doctors office with a black eye. The doctor asked: How did you get that? The woman said: I fell.

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If the Earth is square, why are trees smart? because you touch yourself at night

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met you

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Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

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TWO PADDIES PASS A PUB

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What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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what's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? they have different colored hair

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why was the little boy sad? He tried to dry off his puppy in the oven.

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Why did the black guy drown in the river?? unfortunately he owed 10,000 dollars to a loan shark and couldnt pay his dues So he was tied to an anchor and put in the river.

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yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

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How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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