What did the plane say to the twin towers? Boom

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So a seal walks into a bar... ...seals can't walk.

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go fishing.

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breasts

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Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

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Q: Why are elephants afraid of mice and/or rats? A: Elephants tend to have bad eyesight and startle quite easily?

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whydid the little boy drown? he can't swim

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How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

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Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

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A priest sneeks in to a pre-school and is arrested shortly after for tresspassing.

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What do a turtle and a tree have in common? They both can fly except for the turtle............and the tree

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Romney 2012

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What did the man say to the orphan? No one loves you, you have no friends.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

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Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

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An elephant and a llama walk into a bar. Realizing that they must have broken out of the local zoo, all of the people run out of the bar screaming.

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A black man and a white woman cross paths while walking on the sidewalk. After greeting each other, they continue on their way. Each goes on to enjoy their respective day free of racism and sexism.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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