what do you call a monkey? a monkey

When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

Whats worse than a clock with no hands? Your mom with cancer.

How does a black guy die? He doesn't , he's black

Two friends that are 11 years old are fighting with each other, and one of them says, " Shut the front door." The other friend replies, "We don't even have a front door, because we're both homeless, and we're never going to be adopted because we're on an island, that's how we became friends in the first place."

What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

Carlton

What is long and black The unemployment line

If Miley Cyrus has the ability to come in like a wrecking ball, how come she can't twerk?

Alex Eggbert

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

I like school Said no one ever.

A Jew throwing a dime into a wishing well? Highly unlikely.

What's 2+2? Gonorrhoea

What happened to the peanut who went to NYC? Nothing because he was eaten on the plane

Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

your mom died.

My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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