What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing set? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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how do you get someone out of a chair? hit him with a shovel

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a guy named bob likes sprinkles on his ice cream.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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Kony 2012 - Uganda Be Kidding Me

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Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

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A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc my leg really hurts when I poke it like this." The doctor replies, "Yes, that is a knife."

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Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

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A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

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Why did the people thumbs-up the anti-joke? Because I threatened them with A GUN

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Yo mama is so depressing. That is so sad.

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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The Holocaust

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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Face Hunter is scum

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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