every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Why does the man ignore his wife? Because he is dead.

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

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whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

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Why did the cat cross the road? he wanted to be a docter.

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* two sisters are making yo mam jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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Why are anti jokes funny....cause morons come up with them...

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What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new home? No. Neither has he....

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Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

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why was the black mans shirt ripped? because he escaped genocide in africa

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Can you help jack Off. The elephant?

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What's the difference between hot tea and cold tea? The temperature.

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Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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Okay.

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

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Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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