A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

How many jews can you fit in a car? It depends on how many seats there are, but some could double-buckle and stuff like that to fit more if necessary.

Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

Police Officer: Please step out of the car, sir Jimmy: Xbox...

why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

I may have alzheimers...Thank god I dont have alzheimers

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

A woman wearing a very fancy, striped sweater walks into a bar and sits down. The bar tender asks her “what’ll it be”?. The girl replies “Just a beer for me”. As this happens a child in Africa dies from complications due to starvation.

Whats black and white all over? Michael Jackson

How do you make a little boy get off a swing? You are an adult and perhaps it is inappropriate for you to be on a swing, especially when it is already occupied by a child of the right age.

Boys have swag, real men have class

Why was the 7 year old girl crying? Because its hard to laugh during gang rape.

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

Whats worse than being bored, Being you.

Guy: Hey, you want to dance with me? Girl: Who me? Guy: Nooo that bench over there...

What did one tampon say to another? Nothing they were both stuck up.

What did the amputee get for Christmas? Shot.

Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

How do you know if a monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet? Go and look.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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