What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

What time did the tennis start? Tennish

A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

Dat ass, or dem titties? Your choice.

How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't make sense. Refrigerator.

Womens rights

the midget went to the midget store

Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

roses are red, violets are blue, get in that bed or I stick your head down the loo! Christian grey

My mother always said that jumping in piles of leaves was fun. That was before she was swallowed whole by a 10 foot scorpion.

Q:what word starts with "p" and ends with "orn"? A: popcorn

Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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