Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

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Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

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What's better than r a p e? Consensual sex.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

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did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

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what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

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Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

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Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari. There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

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Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

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Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

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Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

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Why didn't Jesus like pizza? Because he didn't exist.

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Why did the boy like watching NASCAR? He didnt because he was a fish and a secret Soviet spy

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

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catlin: hi Thomas: shut up bich 12 assssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssl;

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why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops