What did the pie say to the other pie? "I'm hungry" So he ate the other pie.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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What do you call black people in a pool? African american swimmers

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How do you torture a turtle? If you came up with an answer to that question you are completely and utterly unethical and immoral.

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What do you say to a black man with AIDS? I hope you get medical help and find a cure for your illness.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

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Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

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Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

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What do you call a creepy person trying to break into your house? A robber

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Knock Knock Who's There Me

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What do you do when you have those days where you feel that you go back three damn steps for every step you take towards your goal? DUUUUUH! You turn your back, see? Now you are getting three steps at the right direction for every right one! LOGIC!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

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What's worse than having embaracing parents? A: they are of the same sex

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How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

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Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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