What do you get when you cross a zebra and a panda? Well, pandas are almost extinct. I guess they gave up and started goin' with zebras.

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your mom died.

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

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Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

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Why was the Microsoft fan happy? Because Steve Jobs died.

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why did the white man jump out of the car? because the car was crashing

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

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What happened when my familys break on the car didn't work? They rolled down a hill and fell off a cliff and died. I loved them.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

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The young orphan boy had high hopes for this Christmas. When he woke up, he ran to the foot of the tree and saw a large box wrapped with seasonal wrapping paper. He looked at it to see that it was for someone else. The boy recieved nothing for Christmas and was later hit by a bus that had veered off of the road to avoid hitting a dog. The boy is now paralyzed and is extremely disappointed as to how his Christmas had unfolded.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet

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The bird is not the word.... Its two

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

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What looks like half an Apple? The other half.

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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What do you call a black man with a small penis? Aids free

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Japan is Weird We aren’t saying Japanese people are weird but it’s a fact that the strangest pictures floating around the internet are from Japan.

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There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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